Dean Keates Admits: I'm Scrappy Do

Last updated : 16 January 2010 By Malcom Dunkley

Dean Keates has finally confessed all, and admitted he is the cartoon character Scrappy Do LCM can exclusively reveal.

Keates, who enjoyed six months standing around in midfield whilst Keiths Alexander told his defenders to lump it up to his strikers, admitted that the reason he left Lincoln was in pursuit of a guy dressing as a monster at the Bescot Stadium.

There the lead went cold, but eventually this madman surfaced at Peterborough, where it was revealed by day he was the slightly over enthusiastic dirvorcee and average lower league journeyman Darren Ferguson, but by night he pretend to be the son of God: Sir Alex Ferguson.

Keates / Do has spent the last few seasons undercover at London Road, but given the dismissal of the imposter recently he has now opted to attempt a return to Walsall becasue they have 'great Scooby Snax'.

The revelation will come as little surprise to anyone at Sincil Bank, as Keates often ran around like a garden gnome on speed for hours and hours at a time. It was suspected at one point that he actually never stopped charging round the ptich, even after everyone had packed up and gone home.

Fred Wilmer, a fan, said this: "I often heard Keates yelling 'derderderder deeeeer' just before a tackle, and going on about something called 'Puppy Power' which we thought was an animal liberation group. How wrong we were."

The search for Shaggy however continues. He can be seen ambling around with a girls haircut doing very, very little. Mystery Inc supporters have suggested he may be none other than Ben Wright, now of Macclesfield. However the mystery of the talking dog with the big appetite has been solved: He was a work of fiction.

LCM has handily provided pictures of the two for you. The one on the left is the annoying puppy that spent an entire feature film inside Rowan Atkinson, and the one on the right is Dean Keates. We think.